Archive for October, 2012

Floor Nineteen

Wednesday, October 31st, 2012

Ding. The elevator arrived at last. Its large shiny metallic double doors inched slowly apart. I could still see parts of my reflection. My blue pin striped suit reflected well off the doors. A gold tie with blue triangles hung perfectly off my neck. The halves of the door tore apart my well groomed face, blue eyes, and short brown hair as it neared closer to being fully open. This process took forever.

Ding. The doors opened all the way.

I wore brown leather shoes. They were perfect. I took careful, well placed steps toward the back of the elevator. I could not feel the transition from the white, marbled floor to the black carpet. I reached the back left corner. I turned around.

The elevator operator wore a red uniform. The words “Dynasty” were printed on the front of his shirt. A piece of gold colored metal spelled his name, Preston. Two pens and a calculator filled the front pocket of his shirt. His black tie was too short. Behind his thick, dark prescription glasses, I could see brown eyes. Long hair that was poorly groomed failed to successfully hide the pimples on his face. I looked toward him, but only with my peripheral vision. He did the same. Silence.

A heavy smell of perfume filled my nostrils. I turned my head slightly to the right. She was beautiful. She wore dark red high heels. They complemented her curves. Toned, tanned legs rode elegantly up toward the hem of a short, black skirt. The bottom of it rested several inches above her knees. And it she looked great in it. A low cut, white blouse showed her ample cleavage. Her left arm was fully sleeved with tattoos, which extended to the top of her shoulder. She wore no wedding ring. Dark black hair flowed flawlessly around her gorgeous face. Some how, I knew her name. Nikki. I viewed her with my eyes down. She did the same. Silence.

Preston pushed the number nineteen. An amber light took its time to display that the instruction was captured. For the first time, Preston looked me in the eyes. I nodded my head in approval. His eyes wavered back toward the floor. The elevator let out a low rumble. Beneath my feet, it felt like a miniature earthquake. The elevator started to head for the nineteenth floor.

It seemed like five minutes passed before we cleared the first floor. Why this happened, I do not know. In fact, the long ride gave me ample time to ponder this question to no avail. However, I do know that a heavy burden of awkwardness filled every corner of that elevator. My eyes continued to look beyond Preston and Nikki, but I still saw them. They did the same and they still saw me.

A slow, mechanical click chimed as we passed the seventh floor. The awkwardness was still there. I knew these two. But I did not know them. I pondered this. It felt like I was at a high school reunion, with two classmates that I never talked too. Three strangers, perfect in their own way, yet we knew each other. I sensed they were pondering something similar.

The mechanical click chimed again. Floor thirteen. I set my mind to the task of starting small talk. It never happened. I looked at Nikki. I said in my head “Hey, how are doing today?” Those words never reached my lips. I looked at Preston and thought, “Long day?” Again, these words failed to find my lips. My thoughts turned to the time this elevator ride was taking. I was anxious for this to be over. They were anxious.

The mechanical click chimed for the last time. Floor nineteen. Thank God. The metallic doors inside of the elevator were dull. Our reflections still showed. The door opened slowly. Three reflections were being torn apart at the time. I stepped forward. The doors rested in the open position. I took three steps onto the white, marbled floor. I turned around. Preston and Nikki were not there. I was not shocked. I was relieved. The doors closed. It reflected a singular, perfect image.


Spent Cartridges

Thursday, October 25th, 2012

Memories are a lot like spent cartridges. At times they are left lying on the ground. We walk away. Other times, we pick up our spent shells and discard them later.”-JMD


Ghost Moon

Tuesday, October 23rd, 2012

I saw the shade of a ghost.
I instructed her to come into the light.
Hesitation followed, as expected.
Different tools were put into use.

Elegant words, and a beautiful heart.
Now she tiptoed forward.
Eyes could see her, mine more than most.
Overwhelmed with joy, we danced at sunrise.

Come mid-day, we held hands.
Exhausted, we watched the sun fall.
I lost her in the darkness that night.
With the moons glow, I see the shadow of the ghost.

-Insert Catchy Subject Line Here-

Tuesday, October 16th, 2012

Techtronic #57

I know very little of you.
This is a goal of which I strive.
Originality is not necessarily my answer.
The solution is wonderfully much deeper.
Techtronic #57 meet me.

Vastly unique, your eyes do not register.
However, dismay for you is not the protocol.
Seeing as most are unaware of my presence.
In fact, in this way you are identical.
In this way, my goal is well met.

Hidden amongst a veil of steel, I prosper.
Surrounded by wires, my voice is heard.
I take great pride in my discovery.
And my findings are gracefully publicized.
Techtronic #57 meet me.

You hold powers that I am jealous of not.
Everlasting life for you is but folklore.
For me, it is a promise I hold dear.
Do no compute, your time is coming.
In this way, my goal is well met.

Techtronic #57 meet me.
Self discovery an occurrence six years past.
I learned my name, will you hear it?
Yes, you lack, but this is not your concern.
Techtronic #57 meet me, meet a soul.


Purple Rose?

Sunday, October 14th, 2012

Finding a Rose                                                                                                       

An elegant, gorgeous rose is a gift, I have long dreamed of.
A flower so precious, so beautiful, a thousand hearts it could  capture at once.
Its petals are a vibrant, glowing shade of red
and to touch these very petals would serve to soften even the most hardened of hearts.

A graceful fragrance flows freely from its core causing smiles to form,
causing souls to laugh.
This subtle, delicate, but powerful rose contains within, the gifts of life, of love, of hope, of happiness.
I have for so many nights dreamed of such a lovely gift;
a gift, I would have no other choice than to share with the rest of this world.

A flower so full of love and caring it could turn any tears to smile, any grief to hope.
To simply be in the presence of such a special rose would cause spirits to rise,
and cause the soul to sing out.
Such a rare gift, one even the angels and gods would be jealous of,
for even their love could not fathom such a flower.

Oh, how I have longed for such a rose, how I’ve toiled at night, reaching, dreaming for this flower.
I often call out with a loud, maddening voice, “Where are you O’rose, where are you O’flower?”
And I always receive the same answer, a sweet, precious voice replies,
“I am right here silly boy, now go back to sleep.”

Her voice slowly fades out, as I close my eyes to rest, but before I can
a gentle, playful smile sneaks onto my face and I whisper softly, “My rose, my rose, I found my rose.”


Normal, No

Saturday, October 13th, 2012

Normal, No

Nobody else wonders?
Or am I the only one.
Ready for my time, I am anxious.
Maybe soon, must be soon.
A door cracked is all I need.
Life’s love lost, what does that even mean?

No one else is curious?
Oh, I believe you see, but I will continue to look.

Right Round

Tuesday, October 9th, 2012

Right Round
Part 5 of more

It was snowing softly. The snowflakes were so beautiful. They fell with grace, a kind of grace, which my eyes were not accustomed to seeing much. It appeared as if they were dancing to a melody only they could hear. One after another they would land on the windshield of my rental car. I tried to count them, but even this could not keep my mind distracted.

Really? I must have repeated that single word a hundred times. What was she thinking? Or was she thinking at all? My thoughts were unclear. I tried in vain to rationalize what just happened, but the only rationale I could generate was, really? I drove quickly. Too fast for someone as inexperienced as I am driving in snow, real snow. I didn’t care. I grabbed my phone and dialed.

“Thank you for calling American Express Air, how may I help you?” a subtle female voice spoke.

“Yes ma’am, I have a quick question for you that you might be able to help me with.” I answered.

“Ok, sure no problem. Go ahead sir.”

“I am scheduled to fly out on the day after tomorrow and I was wondering if there is any way I could catch an earlier flight. Hopefully tomorrow some time?” I asked.

“Sure, let me check for you real quick. What is your flight number?”

This phone conversation was great. It provided me with a distraction, however short or small from the painful realization that my girlfriend was cheating on me. The lady from the airline was super helpful. My flight was rescheduled to tomorrow afternoon. A much needed feeling of relief coursed through my body.

I searched my GPS for a hotel close by the airport. There were several within a short distance. I fixed my eyes on the road while I gripped my steering wheel tightly. Really, really? My phone vibrated on the seat next to me. I let it ring, ring, and ring. It was Tiffany calling and texting me.

I pulled into a Hotel’s parking light. Thankful for the bright sign that signaled its location, which cut through the now heavy snow fall. I shut the engine off. I leaned back in my seat with my eyes closed. Really, really? I took a deep breath and opened my eyes. I started to count. I couldn’t keep up. I continued to count.

Part 4 of more

Friday, October 5th, 2012

Part 4 of more
I opened the door to my father’s black Mercedes-Benz and took a seat. Outside my parents were busy issuing goodbyes and hugs to my twin sisters. Thank God Christy and Cassie drove their own car. I had about as much as I could handle from those two for the night. I was busy getting comfortable in my seat, thinking about lying in bed with my comfortable pillow.

Oh my, it had been such a long day. A day, I wish would soon be over. The funeral services for my Nana actually went as well as one could hope for such an occasion. My Uncle gave a nice speech, which was full of great memories. I could not stop crying during and after he was through talking. The pastor did a wonderful job as well. My Nana was certainly a great woman, and that was even more evident today by all the kind words that were shared.

It started to rain midway through the final service at the cemetery. Everyone was prepared with their umbrellas so that was not a huge deal. However, a curious event occurred right after the final prayer was said by the pastor. As I was walking toward my father’s car, the rain suddenly slowed to a sprinkle. I looked to the sky where I witnessed the sun poking its way in between a perimeter of dark clouds. At that moment, I could feel my Nana and I smiled. I don’t know how to explain any better than that, but it is certainly something I will always remember.

Later in the day, my parents, sisters, and I went to dinner. It was a typical dinner with my family. The food and wine were excellent, which is about the extent of what went well. Apparently my mother’s mission to completely destroy my self-confidence was in full effect despite the fact we had just left her mother’s funeral.

“When are you going to get married? Your sister Cassie is doing so well at her new job and Christy’s newborn is so precious. Don’t you want to have kids? Fix your hair, it’s curling up in the back. You don’t think those other pants would have looked better on you?” On and on my mother would speak to me. I would look to my farther for help, but he was constantly stuck playing the middle. And my sisters, just loved every minute of it. They would egg it on and I have no idea why because they know how upset it makes me. But whatever, sadly one of the best moments of the night was when my father told our waitress, “Check please.”

Finally, my parents made it to the car and their seats. I could hear the engine hum softly, which was the only signal I needed to indicate that I was close to my bed. I pulled my cell phone out. The time was 11:11. I closed my eyes, blew a kiss, and made a wish. Immediately after, my phone began to vibrate. It was a text from boyfriend.

“Hey babe, how are u, how did everything go tday?”
“Really?? How do you think it went, it was my Nana’s funeral.”
“Sarah, I was just wondering how everything was. Just concerned that’s all.”
“Please stop acting like that. When are u coming back home?”
“Acting like what? And by the way thanks for waiting to talk to me at 11 at night.”
“Look, I am sorry. I got caught up at work u know how that goes.”
“When are u flying back?”
“Tomorrow at 10:30, for the hundredth time.”
“Sorry, I just wanna make sure of the time that’s all. Get off my case.”
“Quit saying you are sorry.”
“Look, I just wanted to check on u to see how u were. I know it’s tough for u right now but I don’t what I did to make u so upset.”
Oh my gosh, will he please just shut up and quit texting me.
“No, it is fine. It has just been a long day that’s all.”
“Ok, well I will see u tomorrow night ok? Have a safe trip.”
“Thanks, see you tomorrow.”
“Love ya.”

I stared at the screen for a couple of seconds before I replied, “Love ya.” I looked out my window. The tears on my cheek were starting to slowly dry.

Facebook Meet My Delete Key

Wednesday, October 3rd, 2012

“Went to high school with this person, that’s all I know.” Delete.
“Hmm, don’t even know you…” Delete.
“You have a pretty face. Nothing else to been seen here, moving along quickly.” Delete.
“We use to hang out time to time, not much recently.” Delete
“Always a good friend to me, no complaints here.” Delete.
“Ex-girlfriend, ehhh. I think that sums it up best.” Delete.
“One of my good friends; wouldn’t be who I am today without you.” Delete.
“Ex-girlfriend, well I guess so, but we became close anyway. Awesome person.” Delete
“Yeah, don’t know you . Bye-bye.” Delete.
“Won’t miss you.” Delete.
“Probably my best friend. Pains me to see you go.” Delete.
“Another ex? Still wish it would have worked at times.” Delete.
“Oh, wow this is tough. My family, obviously I’m going to miss yall.” Delete
“Me? Uh oh, almost done now.” Delete.
“And finally, you have always been there; right here, so close to me. Physically at times we were distant, but I always felt you in my heart. Even when I put you on my ignore list, I always came back. Blocked at times, but thankfully that didn’t last long. Fact is, without you there is no me. You complete me. This is the hardest one, but I must say good bye.”
Delete. Invalid Request. Click Help for more Information. Delete. Invalid Request. Click Help for more Information. “Wait, what is this nonsense, why can’t I delete you?” Delete. Invalid Request. Click Help for more Information. “What in the world is going on? Ah snap, duh.”

*My opinion of Facebook, is certainly not a favorable one. But I’m not writing to speak of ill of it, rather to give props. Facebook, along with what seemed to be a simple pondering about the “delete key” on a keyboard, allowed me to create this piece. Hopefully, the next sentence, which will be the last one, completes the picture I have drawn for you. This is a piece about faith, a piece about hope, a piece about God.


WordPress Site Question/Fellow Bloggers Your Help is Appreciated

Monday, October 1st, 2012

Does anyone know how to limit the number of your previous blogs that display on the home screen? Like for instance if you click on my page, the page won’t load every blog I have made since I have started blogging? I fooled around with the dashboard but didn’t see any setting for that.Thanks in advance for any help.


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