Faith and Soul, The Same
So there I was, sitting all by myself surrounded by hundreds if not thousands of anxious individuals. We are all alike in one way. We are waiting anxiously for the intercom to speak out clearly, “Flight such-n-such is now ready to board…flight such-n-such is now ready to board.” I was not as attentive as everyone else.
See I am kind of nervous because this is my first time flying. While everyone was moving quickly toward their gate , I was busy praying to the heavens that I would some how stumble upon a lost sleeping pill . Then I would take the pill before boarding, get on the plane, pass out, and wake up safely at my destination. As you can see I am a bit of an idealist, you never know though, shit happens. The way I look it at if God intended for us to fly he would of gave us wings. I guess that holds little weight with me because I don’t really believe in God. Well at least not the God of traditional religions like Christianity, but that’s an entirely different story.
While pondering my looming voyage upon a bird of steel, I caught a view of myself in a metallic advertisement sign for Viagra. I don’t need Viagra if that’s what you are thinking. I was attempting to distract my mind. I caught a view of my reflection from that plastic cover that encloses the ad. My curly brown hair was extra curly that day. My blue eyes decided to choose the shade of sky blue. Days had passed since I last shaved. I was developing quite the half-ass looking beard. But the ladies like that though, or well that is at least what I believe. I continued to stare at myself, seconds, maybe minutes later a girl took sat down across from my seat.
A coy, sweet little voice chirped out, “You know I am nurse, I could probably grab you a few sample boxes of Viagra from the clinic.”
I looked away quickly from that stupid ad and tried to save face, “Um…No, no I was just looking at myself in the reflection.” I turned looking at her, she had a big smile on her face. Quite a beautiful smile I must admit.
“Right” she responded. “Even better, I have a mirror in my purse in case you need to fix your make up.” She spoke again, grinning ever so wide.
Her wit caught me by surprise, “Yeah, you know what let me get that mirror because there are some smudges on the sign that are obstructing my view.” I returned the smile she was giving me.
She looked me in the eyes and started to laugh, “I am sorry, it has been a long day. These people are driving me crazy.”
“Ha, its no big deal. My name is James.” I stuck out my hand. Damn did I shake her hand to hard? Nah…
She pulled her hand back and began looking for something in her purse.
“Ya know I was just joking about the mirror, right?” I spoke quickly, trying to catch her before she dug out that mirror she promised.
“Yeah, I know that silly. I was not looking for a mirror. I was double checking my flight time.” She replied, still smiling.
She is pretty. She has a glowing bright face with a charming smile. Her dark flowing hair was groomed to near perfection, it nestled neatly just above her shoulders. Her eyes are beautiful. Not to mention, I could tell from out short conversation she is a sweet girl who is also smart. Hmm…I must admit talking to a beautiful young lady is not a bad way to pass the time and ease my growing anxiety. Thank you God.
“So to be quite honest, I could not help but to notice how nervous you look.”
Shit, am I that easy to read, that a strange girl from across the terminal could spot my weak knees? “No, no I am not nervous, just anxious to get going.”
“Oh, right, aren’t we all.” She replied, looking at me kind of strangely, she knew I was lying.
Oddly, I felt comfortable talking to her for some reason. So I figured what the hell, I will just tell her the truth. “So look, yeah, I am kind of nervous, this is first time I have ever flown.” I said with some hesitation.
She started to laugh again, “Are you serious?”
“Uh yeah, but geez thanks for laughing at me and making me feel stupid.” I replied coyly, knowing I would get a reaction back from her.
“No, I did not mean it like that. I just would have not guessed you were nervous because this is your first flight, that’s all.”
“Yeah, I guess your right.”
“So why haven’t you flown before?” she asked while sitting up in her chair.
“I don’t know. Never really had the money to fly where I pleased. Plus, I guess I never had to go anywhere before that required the use of a plane.” I answered, now readjusting myself in my chair and leaning closer to her.
“So where are you flying to?”
“Well actually, I am going to Colorado to surprise my girlfriend. She has no idea I am coming. Her parents have a place there in the mountains. It suppose to be a great spot for skiing.”
“Oh, you have a girlfriend. Why aren’t you up there with her now?” She continued on with her line of questions.
“Well, I was going with her originally, but then something came up at work, so I had to cancel. But I finished what I needed to do early and so I thought surprising her might be a good idea.” I said proudly.
“Oh my gosh that is so sweet!” she said grabbing my arm. “I wish my boyfriend would do something like that for me.. He treats me like crap. Like he would not even fly with me on this trip to support me.” She spoke, looking down now at her shoes. Whoa this guy must be a grade A-dbag.
“Oh, you have a boyfriend. I am sure he is sweet to you, I mean you seem like a cool girl. And well, I hope this is not outline for me to say, but you are very pretty as well. I can’t imagine him not treating you well.” I spoke as she looked up at me quickly.
“Thanks, that is sweet, but I am not pretty and he does treat me like crap.” She replied half smiling, as if she really believed me when I told her how pretty she is, but had not heard anyone say it in a long time.
“No seriously you are …” I started to tell her again how pretty she was, but she cut me off mid sentence.
“Ok, so look flying is really no big deal. I mean the take off and landing can be kind of intense. And well sometimes there is some turbulence that is sort of scary. But other than that, you will be fine, just have faith.” Um, ok quick change of subject. I guess that’s a good thing though. I am sure she does not want to talk about her boyfriend and I rather not talk about my girlfriend.
“Well great, thanks for informing me that two thirds of my trip is probably going to be intense. I feel much better now.” I said back half jokingly. “No, really I feel much better.”
She looked at me and started to gently laugh, “Hush up, it is not that bad, trust me.”
I returned the laughter, “I feel much better now, thanks for the pep talk.”
“Ugh! Shut up ass” she replied, looking down at her beeping phone. Ass? Did she just call me an ass?
“I am only joking.” Turning away from me, she started pushing buttons on her cell phone. I turned my head back toward the Viagra sign. The next few minutes were accompanied by a vast amount of silent awkwardness, until I finally broke the silence, “So are you from around here?”
“No.” she replied sharply and swiftly.
“You travel a lot?” I asked another question, hoping to some how save this conversation.
“Yeah.” She continued to fidget with her phone. By the tone of her voice and the look on her face she was not happy.
I sat back in my chair giving up for the most part while she continued to peck away on her phone. My eyes caught a group of kids toying around with a soda machine. They were trying the ole “lets stick our hand up the big hole in the machine and see if we can grab a drink” trick, which we all know no does not work. I did the same thing as a kid. I surveyed the rest of the airport, nothing to interesting caught my eye, but eventually my gaze came back to this girl. My brain than proceeded to have a debate with itself.
I think I might like her. I mean she is super pretty and easy to talk to…Wait, Wait you idiot you have a girlfriend.Yeah, but we are not that serious. Not that serious? You are flying to Colorado to surprise her, get a hold of yourself. Yeah, true but I mean why I can’t I like her? That does not mean I want date her, I just thinks she is cool and pretty. Is it so wrong to want to hang out with her? I mean we could just be friends. Um, how about she has a boyfriend. Ahh! Shut up to hell with you, its not like I am cheating or anything.
“So let me guess, you are not starring at me, you are just looking at your reflection coming from my face.”
“Oh, no I was thinking about something that’s all and I guess I kind of guess lost in my thought.” I replied, shaking my face as if I just woken up, which in a sense in some what true.
“What were you thinking about?” She asked, turning her attention back toward me now and not her phone.
“ Thinking about something at work that I forgot to do.” I replied, looking back at her now.
“Oh ok, it was not anything important, was it?” she asked.
I decided at that moment to do something spontaneous, from the soul, “No, it was nothing important.” I sat up firmly in my chair and looked in her eyes, “I was wondering…” Flight 36 to San Diego now boarding…Flight 36 to San Diego now boarding I looked toward the big electric board real quick in an act of confusion. I looked back and saw her gathering her things. Fuck!
“Well that is me; I have to getting going now. I hate to run , but I really did enjoy talking to you though.” She said, standing up.
“Ok, well look let me walk with you to your gate, it’s the least I can do for being such great company.”
“No. Look you don’t have to do that, it is on the other side of the airport and I really should be going, so.”
“Look its no problem, besides I have nothing else to do.” I said, standing up myself now.
“Well, ok if you want.” She responded smiling.
We headed off toward the south end of the airport with a hurried pace. I did my best to keep up with her.. We weaved in and out of the people in front of us. We really did not speak much on our way to her gate. In fact, I don’t think we said a word until we actually got to the gate. The whole time I was thinking, its cool, just relax she did not hear you ask that question. No big deal, she has a boyfriend, you have a girlfriend, she didn’t hear your question, everything is fine, she is super hot, and she seems to like you. Ah Fuck! After a few minutes of speed walking, we finally made it to her departure gate.
“Thanks so much for walking with me. You really did not have to do that.” She spoke as she inched closer to her gate, which lead down a deep long mysterious looking tunnel, or well it was mysterious to my virgin aviation eyes anyway.
“Yeah, no it was totally fine. Have a safe trip.” I stammered, trying to say something to leave a lasting impression. Have a safe trip. Smooth one you idiot.
“ Thanks, and well you have a safe trip too.”
“Well, hey look can I get like an email or something to get in touch with you!” She looked up at me and motioned with her hands that she could not hear me. Fuck!
“Look, I don’t even know your name!”
Right before she was out of sight, she turned and yelled back, “Sarah! My name is Sarah!”
She walked down the tunnel out of sight. I turned around and sat there at the departure gate pondering what the hell happened. My anxiety about the plane ride had all but subsided at this point. I looked back at that tunnel one last time. I probably would not see her again. Hell I did not even know her last name, which was probably for the best. I could not help but to think about her as I walked away.
Faith is a passionate intuition. William Wordsworth
A little faith will bring your soul to heaven, but a lot of faith will bring heaven to your soul. Author Unknown
What is soul? It’s like electricity – we don’t really know what it is, but it’s a force that can light a room. Ray Charles
Comments? Did you like this? Want to see part 2 and 3???